I want to write, I want to run, I want to bake, I want to conquer the world right now.
The sun is warm and bright and I am beginning to feel like a new person emerging from a cocoon of heartbreak and subdued moods
It is one of those rare days where I have the day off from work. I dream of days like this, sitting at the corner coffee shop, watching people walk by briskly or sometimes strolling. Me near a window on my computer, pounding away at the keys, pulling my eyes away from the computer long enough to watch the world go by.
Even though there are a million thoughts going through my head, I have this urge to get up, set aside my computer and go run, so I can feel the wind in my face, the sweat pouring down and just the adrenaline pumping through me encouraging me to go on for miles and feel free.
Maybe it is the excitement of my goal for another half marathon or maybe even two this year. I want to challenge myself, push myself to run and run and run.
It is odd that heartbreak has turned into my muse, given me inspiration to write and to run, however it took out the inspiration to bake, even though I always found being in my kitchen therapeutic.
The stirring, the mixing, the rolling, the flour strewn all over my kitchen counter and sometimes on me, the music in the background, makes me forget everything else in my life. I love how every little item thrown together ends up being something edible, something to show and enjoy and share with friends.
The last few weeks have been difficult, I have shied away from the kitchen, going to market seemed like a chore, getting out of bed and trying not to think of why someone would hurt me was a challenge. Putting one foot in front of the other, so I could step outside and face the world seemed to bring me down.
But the last few days, I have found myself once again believing in myself, the words of encouragement from my friends, help me kick the blues, makes me want to grab my life back and not let someone have the power over me. I am a bad loser, so if I continue to wallow in self-pity, the other person wins and I want to be the one who wins this battle.
So here I am all signed up for the WordPress daily challenge and also back in my kitchen being inspired to try new things for the market.
While listening to the music in my kitchen, I hear a song which resonates with me, the words are what I want to say to him. I feel tears welling up in my eyes, but I focus on the baking instead. I pull the tray out of the oven and stare at what I just made and it makes me smile.
My heart maybe broken and I might have moments of despair and wanting to sit around moping. I may even give into the temptation of moping, but for now, I am ready to write, bake and run.
So on that note, I put on my running shoes and head outside, time to pound that sidewalk once again.