As I get one year older its all about candles and bucket lists

As I approach another birthday, I am more than ever keenly aware of all the changes in me. Parts of my body seems to be embracing gravity and I seem to be fighting stiff achy joins with fatigue and a few grey hairs along with few more wrinkles. I was wondering how I am going to make it to half a century, which will be here soon if this is how I am feeling now?

Of course as I get older I can say that I have more life experience under my belt in a hindsight kind of way and pass it on my younger relatives or friends who will choose to ignore it anyway.

In the last few weeks as my birthday was looming in front of me, I have been trying to look back and see what changes I have made and maybe what changes I need to make to my life. As much as I have tried to ignore the aging factor, it seems every time I look in the mirror I notice a few more grey hairs making its appearance. It seems my hair follicles are telling me to accept the inevitable. I never thought there would come a day I would see so much white hair, which is more obvious because of my black hair. I guess I could always patronize myself with the thought that this grey hair equals being distinguished or more experienced.

Looking back I realize that I had assumed that by the time I get to this of stage of life I would have a career that I loved, a chunk of change in my bank account, house owner and basically living the good life. But instead here I am trying to be self-employed, chasing the crazy dream that I have always had.

Sometimes I questions myself, if this a much delayed mid-life crisis or is this my life?

As I sit here trying to recall the bucket list items I had a few years ago, all I can remember from the list is  running a marathon.   I can look back and be happy that I can tick that off my list now along with the 25 plus half marathons I have run. It seems forgetfulness should be added to the aging factor.

Maybe I am one of those late bloomers, who starts everything later in life. While most of my friends were getting married and having kids, I was chasing a different dream of wanting to be a journalist/writer (which I did) and traveling the world. I have no regrets of not sticking to the norm and doing those things, but at the same time I guess I wish I had made different choices.

Maybe now is the time to sit down and make another bucket list, even though I am not ready to kick the bucket.

Procrastinate less is gonna be the number one item on my list. For some reason as I get older, I am turning out to be more of a procrastinator than I ever was. I was one of those people who always thrived under pressure, but I seem to be taking that to a whole other level. I should add write/blog more to my list, but words just seem to be fail me lately.

I could focus on the negative aspects of my life, the wrinkles, the grey hairs and aches and pains and make lists, but instead, I will blow out the candles on that cake and be thankful for the experience I have had so far and for all that I have achieved. After all the past is gone and the best is yet to come.


About my random musings

I am originally from South East Asia and I moved to the US about 15 years ago to follow my heart. My heart has since been broken a few times, but I continue to be on journey of trying to mend it. I could talk about running, baking or writing in a small crowd, but put me in a room full of strangers and I will be the one standing in a corner people watching. When I am not writing or running, I would be in my kitchen, flour strewn all over the kitchen counters, music playing in the background and me just rolling and folding dough, excited about what my creation will turn out to be. Besides that I love passionately, when I love, I give it my all, not always a good thing, but that is who I am. I jump both feet in and sometimes I come out with regrets but having learnt a lesson. I believe everything happens for a reason and this is my place to share bits and pieces of my life, my adventures and sometimes misadventures. Hope you enjoy reading my stories as much I enjoy sharing them with you.
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11 Responses to As I get one year older its all about candles and bucket lists

  1. Jane Gealy says:

    Belated birthday greetings! Bucket lists are great! I helped people live their dreams for 12 years and it was the best job ever. Happy days.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ann Coleman says:

    Happy Birthday! (a little early) And you know, I don’t think there’s a single person who doesn’t look back over their life and wish they had done something a little differently. But you made the choices that were right for you then, and you’ll keep making the choices that are right for you now. We do change as we get older, but life is still an adventure, waiting to happen. Embrace it!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you Ann. It’s always a hindsight kind of thing of wishing you done things differently, even though at that moment it was probably the best choice to make. I’m gonna continue doing what makes me happy and enjoy the adventure. Thank you for the wishes too.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I agree with you Tania, the best is yet to come! Give yourself some time because I believe your business will become a success and everything else will fall in place for you! Happy Birthday!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Thank you so much for your beautiful and thoughtful comment which made me teary eyed. I am so grateful for my friendship with you, because despite the distance, I know you will always be there for me and got my back no matter what. I truly appreciate your words of wisdom and the fact that and always there to listen to the craziness thats going. Your words mean so much to me and I am so glad that we are friends and share a special bond. Thank you again for being a part of my life and for all the encouragement and support and for your wishes.


  5. Ruth says:

    I’ve known you for ages… that explains my grey hairs too then. From then …we have crossed many miles and been venturing our own lives therefore have missed out on keeping in touch on many occasions. The reason we always catch up from where we stopped to have a good laugh and crazy fun is all due to your attitude. You are a honest and very talented person. The reason, my friend you are not a multimillionaires is due to you being selfless, honest and being a daring person. I’ve never known you to play safe. As you already know, not all whom are settled with good job and family are in cloud nine. Most prefer to play safe, compromise with what they have, and don’t want to come out of their comfort zone. Many may not admit but admire your will power, amazing cooking talent, articulated writing skill,great sense of humor, physical stamina that enable you to do the marathons, and your beautiful attitude. What more does it matter. I am so proud to call myself as your friend…. and i hope we grow old and grey gracefully together. Happy Birthday soon xx 😘

    Liked by 1 person

  6. joyroses13 says:

    Keep that attitude! Who knows what is around the corner! I have a birthday approaching as well, and I know what you mean about looking in the mirror! Life hasn’t turned out as I have expected but in other ways I have gained things that I never expected!
    It’s all about embracing the moment and being happy with the here and now! I have no clue of what the future holds, but like you said the best is yet to come, so I will just cherish the moments as they come!
    Happy Early Birthday! 🙂 I will say this, I look at my teens and can say that I really am happy that I am not a teenager right now dealing with this world! Even if they don’t have gray hairs yet! LOL!


    • Thank you. Life never turns out how we plan or expect it to, which sometimes is a good thing. I am doing my best to embrace the journey I am on and take in stride the challenges that life seems to throw me from time. Like you I am glad to say that I am not a teen in this very complex time in the world, where technology seems to have taken over everything. Thank you for the birthday wishes too.

      Liked by 1 person

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